Peaceful greetings to all of you in the New Year!

My prayer is that you and yours will be filled with prosperity in every avenue of your lives and that God will get the glory from your being that bright shining beacon of hope and ray of sunshine to someone else and their families who may be experiencing various health concerns and matters of the heart. 

Well, here I am, blessed again, at the beginning of a very new year.  This year in September, I will have resided in Concord for two years, God willing.  So much has happened during my first year in Concord…more than I could have ever imagined.  I’ve met some very interesting people who have become as family to me.  This new place which is not a new place to me is my home now.  I relate to it as such…I feel I am at home here.  My heart is here.  I experience love here.

God has restored what I lost and what I chose to give up.  He’s been a keeper for me.  I’ve experienced raw emotion.  I’ve been through great joy and despair.  But thank God for Jesus, I am still here and standing.  God is truly good and awesome.  God has been good to me.  His grace has given me an ability to get through the difficult and tough moments of last year both physically, spiritually, financially and other personal matters as well.

Many moments of last year were wrought with mixed emotions, uncertainty and feelings of being alone and isolated.  At times, I felt as if I were in exile.  I knew that God was always with me…but I somehow felt that I was without and somehow I just knew that I was in need of some “things” in my life that I felt I wasn’t receiving.  Perhaps it was a modified type of pity party at times.  No one was there but me…from all outside appearances everything was “all good” as the saying goes…so why then the feelings of isolation? 

More than likely what was happening was that I simply “wanted” to be in another category.  This category was probably created in my subconscious mind, which I traversed often by ways of reviewing my past life, i,e., what was instead of what is, if you will.  I had become complacent in that, I felt for some reason, something was amiss, something that used to be there was not there and surely I must need it and I knew I wanted it too or so I thought. 

So I had the awesome task of believing that I knew better than God.  Yes, that’s what I was thinking.  I’d been in a pseudo reverse-forward motion aka denial about a few things that had been happening in my life at that time last year. 

My health was better.  Wasn’t it?  There were still reasons for concern, however overall I am blessed beyond measure.  There was a time when I wasn’t able to fully execute my ADLs independently.  But this certainly had been fixed by our Father.  I was living on my own, independently and reasonably so, even on my new fixed income.  Learning to do more with less has been a challenge and daunting to say the least but He has taught me how to make it look good no matter what it seems, and guess what?  It is good, no matter what it is!!!

The stigma of being disabled doesn’t quite bother me as much as it used to…however, I’ve decided to respond to what I do for a living questions, in this manner, I state very simply “I’ve retired early.” 

This makes me laugh because people immediately go into strange mode…and start trying to guess my age!  I just fake it and say I planned really well and that my compensatory package was the best there was to offer.  When asked what plan that is, I just say, it was life changing and involved new life, which is what I have, new life and a new lease on life.  So for some reason that makes me feel better, because I do know that I’ve had a life altering experience and this heart disease that I have, no longer has a hold on my mental state of mind.  I am in control of how I am perceived.  I must take care in caring for myself and in caring for myself I must include my mental health as well. 

What the mind can conceive it can achieve, believe this and you too, undoubtedly will begin to experience major life affirming changes within your own heart health situations. 

I care for myself, I love myself and so must you too.  I no longer have the stress of catastrophic illness which had plagued me for so many years.  Pretending to employers that nothing was wrong with me…just trying to keep a job to pay the rent and keep food on the table for my family.  That pretense nearly killed me.  Do you know what I’m talking about?  Listen.  Please don’t get me wrong, I love the corporate world…that is where I became.  But that is also where I came undone…and when there was an opportunity to get rid of me…poof be gone was I. 

So, this is what I ended up with...trying to meet the crazy and ridiculous requirements corporate places upon folk, making them into modern day drones with feigned dedication, all the while you find that you may be losing way to much blood, sweat and tears for no good and apparent reason…no thanks!!!

I live as I am today, in thanksgiving for a lesson well learned.  Put your spiritual self first, that is the Christ in you, then the rest will follow and all will be in order.

This is a new day, a new beginning, a new year.  We are at the beginning of the second half of a new decade, in this new millennium.  What changes will you make this time?  What will you decide to do again and keep that decision, no matter what?  What will you give up to get? 

I’ve learned too, that some things are just not worth it.  Hold on to only what is valuable in your life….those things are certainly not what can be purchased at any price!  Each of you possesses a gift bestowed upon you by divine manifestation which is priceless. 

You are to know that there will always be ongoing health concerns and compliance will always be the deciding factor in what ultimately will become our best end health results.    

I’ve found that there is one connection that exists in everyone, albeit some of us don’t like to utilize this gift and that gift is the gift of love.  I implore you to love, love, love and love some more.  I ask that you give of yourself in positive ways, not for selfish reasons but for the sheer delight in giving what was given to you without your asking for it….Love was given to each of us. Love is in each of us.

Find something or someone to love, but please let it be mutual, and available if it is of the romantic sort, and just do that, love, love, love.  Love is action.  It requires participation and feeling…love empowers, love makes one smile, love is lovely, and love is in your hearts don’t you know! 

Jesus is love.  He’s in our hearts, He is our heart…He and the Father alone knows the emotions that you are experiencing.  In your still quiet moments, take it down and release the cares and concerns of your situations to Him…in Christ, all things are easy…we’ve been instructed to take His yoke for it is easy.  The burdens that we carry are not necessary for our survival.  In fact carrying these burdens we are often times unable to overcome situations.  Some of us seek out the consul of a family member or friend.  That is good.  However, at times they can not fully understand what we are experiencing especially in matters of a “sick” heart.  Yes, sick heart, that scares people, it makes them go into panic mode.  So you see, Jesus is the only one, who can stop that terror that grips you in your mind that you won’t make it through this ordeal.  He will give you His peace and love and the confidence to know that you are victorious in your health.

Let me tell you, if He calmed the raging waters, He can certainly calm your fears and provide you with shelter from the storm you are in but going through. 

I promise this to you, I’ve been there…I know first hand, what’s playing out in your thought processes.  I was stricken with heart disease when I was in my thirties…and not ready to cash in my chips.  There is a great stigma to having heart disease.  People and perhaps even yourself are afraid that you won't be able to participate and engage in every previous aspect of your life that you were accustomed to.  It's like they can't deal with you having a sick heart...but your heart can be well...it can be improved primarily through the renewing of your mind.  People will look at you differently when you "see" your "self" as whole and well.

Here I am today, still here, with you, as a living testimony, moving on to another blessing and thriving shall I say!  You can be here too!

It has to do with what’s going on in your head, my friend.  Get your head together and live your life…in compliance…there is much for you to do today, I encourage you to experience all that your new life holds…just for you.  You are blessed therefore, be a blessing indeed.

I am infused with excitement to see where my new path will lead me this year and beyond…this is the new beginning that I’ve waited a lifetime for.  Won’t you please join me in celebrating your greatly improved health, your heart, your love of life and God’s goodness?

I believe there is more for you to do so come on, get on board with the new thing which is happening for you.  Help blaze and lighten the trail with your new testimony of wellness in mind, body and spirit by faith in action because you’ve gone through and passed with flying colors!

Be well in all your doings!